Nursery Rhymes are not as innocent as they seem

Yesterday, a friend of mine whom I shall refer to as infiniteman, set his MSN status to:
"How much wood would a woodchuck chuck
if a woodchuck could chuck wood?"

In response to that, the following conversation took place....

m A r V says: Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers. Did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers, where's the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked? infiniteman says: you're delusional. peter piper didn't pick any peck of pickled peppers infiniteman says: peter piper smoked weed m A r V says: he did ? m A r V says: and humpty dumpty sold it to him? infiniteman says: no it was little red riding hood. that's what she keeps in her basket. pretending to be going to her grandma's place so the police won't suspect her m A r V says: so that's why the big bad wolf was after her m A r V says: to eat her and steal her weed infiniteman says: yup infiniteman says: little red riding hood....that cunt m A r V says: how can you say that? maybe it was for her grandma.. infiniteman says: sorry dude, no respect for drug pushers she should have just worked at a strip bar m A r V says: little red riding hood was still a minor, it would have been illegal. infiniteman says: humpty dumpty found about little red riding hood's little business so little red riding hood got rid of him by pushing him off the wall infiniteman says: well maybe she should have been a waitress then infiniteman says: that's one bad little girl m A r V says: some say she even had an affair with peter pan infiniteman says: peter pan's a child sex slave trader infiniteman says: he was probably scoping her out m A r V says: and captain hook was trying to rescue them infiniteman says: naw....captain hook and his pirates were trying to get into the business themselves but peter kept interfering......they are rivals Later on.... m A r V says: and you know, jack & jill went up the hill not for a pail of water.. that was just an excuse m A r V says: they actually went up there to have sex infiniteman says: tsk tsk tsk.....r they related? or was it incest? m A r V says: i don't really know m A r V says: jack only wanted a one-night stand but jill was serious about the relationship m A r V says: they had a tussle m A r V says: and that is why jack fell down and broke his "crown" m A r V says: and jill came tumbling after m A r V says: i think "crown" is another word for penis infiniteman says: ic ic.....so then they had to amputate his penis coz it couldn't be saved infiniteman says: so jack became jacqueline and jacqueline and jill had hot lesbian sex m A r V says: really? that's not i heard infiniteman says: what did u hear then m A r V says: last i heard, jill was with goldielocks infiniteman says: i thought goldielocks was just a whore who slept around alot.....the story was that she slept with 3 bears in one day m A r V says: oh.. now i get it.... m A r V says: it says that goldielocks ate their porridge infiniteman says: lol m A r V says: "porridge" is another word for... m A r V says: hmm... what else white and starchy m A r V says: hahaha infiniteman says: i dunno starch?